Does time change a person, or do events during the passing of time change a person?

I feel this year I have changed. Have I changed due to the fact I am older, due to the fact that I have advanced in the chronology of time by a chapter... or changed because of my actions as a free-willed human agent, because of personal circumstances...

I don't feel like going to Huagang anymore. It is like an entity. Everything I worked hard for now is so miniscule to me now. It's like I am doing this just because I am supposed to, not because I want to. I don't feel I deserve the kind of treatment I get for what I do. Whatever I do, nothing will change in the people's mindset. Whatever I worked hard to accomplish, nobody appreciates them. Seriously, what am I working hard for? What am I doing?

And tomorrow welcomes another generation into here, so do I pretend and happily invite them?

Who am I?
I have seriously no idea now.


Time continues to spirit away from existence.
And I continue to turn away from reality.
And I slowly change into an ethereal imagination.
A manifestation of thoughts.
With no actions.
Nor anymore desires or wishes.

And may this train of thoughts... eventually reach someone who understands them someday.

I am a fool, in the middle of people who do not understand me.

I am a clown, playing tricks for them.

So, who am I, really?